Archive
Becoming selective
A common misconception about Game is that it’s about developing the ability to get any girl. Wrong. What is an attractive quality in a man? Pre-selection. What do men with choice do? Select. What do desperate men do? Take anything. How can you be the selector? Select! To a certain extent if you copy the behaviours of the person you wish to be then ultimately you can become that person, or at least pass yourself off as that person.
Kezia Noble stressed this in the talk on DHV she gave at the Ross Jeffries seminar. She suggested making a list of qualities you look for in a woman; actually literally thinking about it, hard, then physically writing down what you’re looking for. This mindset really shines through. So does neediness. Make your choice.
If you’ve been on a similar Game journey to me then one thing Game will have given you is to make you realise what you want in a woman. Well, back up a second. First off it makes you realise that you have choice. Then when that sinks in you realise all the awful shit you’ve done in the past. Then you realise how awesome you are. Then you realise how lame a lot of girls are. Then you work out what you really want.
Spool forward to now and I’m mulling over my lack of success at online dating. I start to wonder if perhaps women are a bit cleverer than I take them for. Maybe the reason they’re not replying to me is that I’m not their type. Don’t for a second think there are many women out there looking for a life of casual sex. I still don’t believe that. Doesn’t mean you can’t get casual sex off them, though, but that’s a different point. I think single women are looking for Mr Right. I think they know what they want and they have a type. Most girls move within a social group and it has a defined type or style. For girls beneath approximately age twenty eight this is desperately important to them. They’re Hoxton girls, they’re media girls, they’re slightly posh snowboardery types, they’re poor arty types, they’re hard working hard playing medics and on and on. I’m increasingly convinced that in online dating girls are looking for the guy who will slot nicely into their circle of friends and social scene.
With this in mind I decided to carry out an exercise. I did a basic search and got up a list of results. I then went through and picked the first eight results where the girl looked ‘ok’ and at first glance the profile seemed ‘ok’. I really tried to skim the profile and try and assess whether me of five weeks ago would have thought it was adequate and possibly worth a message. What I then did was go back through each profile and really try and think the way girls think. Really pick apart what’s there and try and work out if this girl would think I would fit into her social scene and if she would fit into mine. I switched the mindset of ‘message anything worth doing and see what you get back’ to the mindset of someone with options and thought hard about whether this girl would be suitable for me. Could I tolerate her? Would her inane babble drive me to murder? Would her naïve political opinions cause me to scream in her face in the first five minutes?
Let’s begin..
HB One
[oops no pic]
Why should you get to know HB One?
because i’m cute, fun and awesome even if I can’t do maths? Definitely playful and great at conversations. I like writing, photography and laughing and I’m a very lucky lady who loves her job (teaching). The kids are brilliant. I like left wing politics, reading and philosophy and I am also the proud owner of a bmx (can’t do any tricks)and a rather awesome frisbee (can throw AND catch). I like singing out loud, dancing and I am a sucker for the big wide world. Life you see, is trippy.
[Left wing teacher. Hangs out with similar leftie teachers. The bmx and frisbee make me think of Nathan Barley; silly Shoreditch twats. Why would you own a bike without gears? Madness. This girl would definitely not consider me within her definition of “cool”. Notice how girls think writing stupid shit in their profiles is endearing.]
She describes her ideal match thus:
I tend to like men who are easy going and if you’re cute, well, that’s a bonus[looks are important]. Lovers of food, travel and live music [women love the idea of loving live music] get a massive thumbs up here. An opinion without arrogance and someone who likes to learn is always an attractive trait [mindblowingly patronising. seeks Beta]. I wouldn’t mind if you take an interest in the world around you or if you like hugs[why thank you]. But i’m open to different things so surprise me if you must.[These last two sentences tell you everything you need to know about what goes on in this girl’s heart]
Verdict: No.
On a looks basis then yes I’d fuck her but that’s beside the point. Would this girl fit in with me? No. She would try to dominate and horribly fail. Would I fit in with her scene? No. In her eyes I wouldn’t be cool enough or have the right job. Also, I am not Beta so she’d give me short thrift.
Oh no Bhodisatta! You’re frame is weak: you’re trying to work out if you will fit in with her rather than the other way round. True. But I’m pretty open minded and can go out with girls from most different social scenes. The reverse is not true. Also, let’s not be unrealistic here; as I’ve said in the previous article online dating seems to put the power in the hands of the females. It’s not a massive frame-collapse to make an initial assesment of whether you’ll fit in with a girl’s social circle. It’s realistic.
HB Two
Why should you get to know HB Two?
[oops no pic]
I used to be shy and sometimes, occasionally it still happens. By taking risks and making myself speak and perform in front of big crowds I’ve changed. [starts promising]
I was born and raised in New York City. I come from a very loving broken home. [uh oh. potentially emotionally damaged]The child of two psychologists I’m prone to possibly over-analysing things. [I have already excluded her]With three older brothers, I have always been appreciated for being a girl [ALERT. Thinks she’s special because she’s female.]. I went to college in St. Louis and came to London to do my MA in Fine Art back in 2000. London has been my home for the past 10 years except for a 3-month stint 3 years ago when I lived in Marseille doing an artist’s residency.[pretentious]
I enjoy dancing, baking cakes and giving gifts. I tend to giggle a lot when I first meet someone which is quite charming, I’m told, because it makes the person feel that they are very funny, and let’s face it, not everyone is funny [how kind of you]. I like getting to know people one-to-one, but I also really enjoy being part of a group [nice mindless truism]. I like to have dinner parties. As much as I love being with other people, I’m not afraid to go out to eat or to the movies by myself. [these artists are a daring sort]
I am high maintenance in my quest to be low maintenance. I will go a long way out of my way in pursuit of a bargain. I am bit of a pack-rat – I don’t like throwing things away or losing touch with old friends. I dress casually most days but I also love to get dolled up for a night out.
If a list of adjectives is useful I’m ambitious, hard-working, talented, clever, trusting, self-aware, articulate, warm and open.
I am an artist working mainly with video and performance, although I also have a degree in painting.[she’s boring and pretentious] I use a lot of humour in my work. Having a day job which is art-related and meaningful is important to me. My art is an excuse to indulge in activities I enjoy which I believe makes it accessible and fun for the viewer.
She describes her ideal match thus:
I’m looking for someone who can make me laugh and make me think. I would also like us to feel warm and fuzzy about each other.[wants Mr Right to give her the pussy tingle. This girl would be dead meat in daygame and would respond really well to game, especially with the glaring holes in her personality and all her neuroses. The sad thing is she will probably only meet totally Beta dweebs who meet her bullshit criteria.]
Verdict: no
HB Three
[oops no pic]
Why should you get to know HB Three?
Has it really come to this? Evidently yes. [I like it. No denial about doing online dating]
Wouldn’t it be lovely just bumping into ‘the one’ at the cheese counter in Waitrose? Better still would be to order a tall, dark, handsome creative type along with your goats cheese. Now there’s an idea…. [shops at Waitrose, buys goat’s cheese and writes reasonably well (missing the apostrophe off ‘goats’ unfortunately). She is socio-economic filtering here which smacks of more honesty and non-nonsense than most girls on the site. She’s not boasting about how leftie she is or how she likes backpacking and hostelling. This girl likes the finer things in life and is sorted. Tiny BMXs: no. Goat’s cheese: yes.]
I suppose this way I can weed out any NDubz or Robbie Williams fans. [Nice]
She describes her ideal match thus:
Like me, you probably won’t think internet dating is cool. But you’ll still be cool.
You’re creative, interesting, intelligent and possibly even an incy wincy bit arrogant [wants an Alpha]. You’ll make me laugh and cry for all the right reasons, and create amazing culinary treats 🙂
Oh and extra points for facial hairiness
Verdict: Yes.
As well as being fit this girl is attractive more for what she doesn’t say than what she says. No stupid lists of things she likes: “walks in the park, winter sunsets, mugs of cocoa, the crisp winter leaves, blah, blah”. Total absence of left wing shite. She makes no attempt to qualify and her profile displays her belief she has a right to select. Classic game. I will definitely message this girl but in all likelihood she will not reply. With a face like that and profile like that she’ll be getting dozens of messages a week from guys better looking than me. Shame.
HB Four
[oops no pic]
Why should you get to know HB Four?
Things I like: cheeky sarcasm, yoga, good views, cute smiles, half full glasses, planning holidays, world music [uh oh].
Things I love: blue skies, dancing, a bargain, dressmaking, long walks in the Lake District, muesli, London, friends and family.
Things I’m not so keen on: getting a stitch, narrow mindedness [i.e non-left wing politics], tequila, cold feet, bad customer service and weird sweets colleagues bring back from their holidays.[quite funny]
I’m a sociable, optimistic sort – love to keep busy, and make the most of time off. If I’m in London that usually means exploring what’s the South Bank has to offer, and if not, that probably means enjoying myself on holiday, or sunning myself in Spain.
She describes her ideal match thus:
Well seems that word ‘spark’ sadly doesn’t have a clear definition, but ideally someone who can laugh (including at himself), and who is happy to indulge in a bit of silly banter. Openmindedness is, in the words of soulmates ‘absolutely crucial’ [wants someone with the exact same 3rd world-hugging politcal views as herself]. And it’d be nice if you enjoy meeting people and are happy to spend time with friends and family.
Verdict: No.
Why? She isn’t fit and her profile is totally unexceptional. It’s not bad but there is zero in there to attract me.
HB Five
pictures removed!
[the pictures are a turn-off]
Why should you get to know HB Five?
Pretentious wank, Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank.[then you are not open minded you stupid cunt]Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank.
Pretentious wank in French,Pretentious wank in French,Pretentious wank in French,Pretentious wank in French.
[This girl is an idiot. She’s totally self obsessed and is lost in a contrived world of art, intellectualism, literature and god knows what. No surprise she’s French as plenty of those snail-guzzlers have this faux intellectual/artsy thing going on]
She describes her ideal match thus:
Pretentious wank, [wants a big cock]. Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank.
Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank.
Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank,Pretentious wank.
[Just typical garbled contradictory nonsense. I hate this girl so much we exchange these pleasantries]
2010-11-28 12:17:47
I read your profile and I thought it was terrible. You’ll scare away any man of high value. It reads like the ramblings of a victorian spinster who isn’t getting any.
Lay off the crack.
2010-11-28 20:56:57
Haha!!! Fuck you too 🙂
HB Six
[oops no pic]
Why should you get to know HB Six?
So.. me and how great/smashing and good I am. I’m new to this, I’ll work up to it! [zero effort. my looks are enough. not with a hooter like that girlfriend..]
She describes her ideal match thus:
Happy go lucky rainbow gypsy meets a guy that knows were he’s going, who knows how to get there and mainly how to have a good time on the way. Ouch my friend has just read this..she’s in hysterics. Says I sound like I’m ‘internet dating?’…Ha!
Ok so I’m losing the ‘rainbow gypsy’ and replacing it with tropical wonder ball. Make of it what you will. I don’t want you to think I’m not taking this seriously because I am.. I really am! [lives in a state of cognitive dissonance.]
Ok tropical wonder ball, Its confusing. I’m dropping it. So yeah someone good?
One definite, someone that is calm and doesn’t get too stressed about things.
[Totally inarticulate. Unable to specify what she wants. She’s a flake. Just to practice my arrogant frame I send her this:]
2010-11-28 12:22:58
Hi HB Six,
I just love the way you’re incapable of describing yourself and of articulating what you are looking for in a man. I find that very attractive in a woman. Seriously. You think I want some woman who writes a load of crap about herself or a big list of requirements she looks for? Not the way I was brought up.
Also, it’s funny the way all but two of your pictures are grainy and look like they were taken by a stalker.
Don’t bother checking my profile; it’s a lie. Also I don’t look good on photo; my raw masculine power doesn’t come out.
Get in touch if you want me to help you work out what you want. (i.e me).
J
Verdict: no. I don’t expect a response and I’m not disappointed.
HB Seven
[oops no pic]
[Just look at those needy eyes. Burning with the desire to ‘do good’.]
Why should you get to know HB Seven?
Hello! I’m friendly, a bit shy, curious and open to new things! I love eating out, going to weird and wonderful classes and also love a duvet day with good food and films!
I’m qualifying to be a Drama Therapist at the moment (I can explain what that means if you like-) [not only does she have a made-up woman’s job but she’s nicely patronising as well] I love my field of work and it allows me to meet a range of interesting people in a creative, caring and sensitive way. [meets low-achievers/immigrants/etc and patronises them]
I write now and then as I see it as an absolutely brilliant therapeutic tool (hence thee career choice) especially when you read over what you’ve written a year or years later and have a penny dropping ‘ahhhhh I see!’ moment about yourself.
I love finding new places to eat and walking down beautiful streets after getting lost (despite having an Iphone with a map I still get lost in London- despite actually being from London!) I’m a little clumsy – but it’s all apart of my wonderfully impulsive nature! [women should learn some basic game; actively showing you are stupid, ditsy and illogical is not attractive. why do they think it is?]
– Think that’s enough for now ….
She describes her ideal match thus:
Someone who is open minded with some more traditional qualities too [left wing opinions but treats her special because she’s a girl]. Needless to say I like to be treated with respect and maturity [just as I said]. If you’re open to fun and exciting experiences and want good company like I do.
A sense of humour is always a great thing as well as good looks and a bit of sensitivity when needed. Someone fun, playful who could be a friend too. On a shallow note- I like a guy to dress and smell great! – well attraction is important right?
I’d like to be treated like a lady but also rugby tackled now and then… and then be given a hand up, apologised to etc etc. [this girl is a total little princess with hypocritical personal beliefs and a made-up job]
Verdict: no
HB Eight
[oops no pic]
Why should you get to know HB Eight?
I am looking for you whoever you are. I’m open to all possibilities so surprise me and let’s chat soon.
[I like it. Very Asian. The man is to be the star in the relationship. She is there to accessorize him. I can roll with this. She’s very submissive as well. She doesn’t even bother describing herself. She’s a little Asian doll waiting for a strong man.]
She describes her ideal match thus:
Someone trustworthy, with compatible interests, a good communicator, cheeky sense of humour, with similar values, who is understanding, fun, interesting and can hold an intelligent but interesting and irreverent conversation. Someone with which I can be completely comfortable, honest and intimate. And the usual – happy, generous, considerate, well balanced/ well adjusted, tolerant, strength character of in adversity, honourable, sensitive, independent, kind to animals, small children and the vulnerable etc, tall dark & handsome gentleman.
[Wants a big strong man to sweep her away]
Verdict: Yes
I can definitely sweep this rittle Asian girl off her feet. Importantly, her profile is not full of things which annoy me.
*******************************************************
So at the end of this exercise I am surprised to find that when I really concentrate on a profile and think it through that most of them are not compatible with me. I will experiment for a few weeks with taking a lot more time and care to find profiles where:
- I think the girl will get a sense that I could tick all the boxes about me fitting in with her life.
- The girl meets my criteria.
Yup.. someone out there could probably game each one of these girls and get a result. There’s obvious things about each one which you could use. Thing is.. I’m not interested in this. I’d find that kind of Game demeaning. I don’t want to pull ‘any’ girl. I want the ones I like!
What are my criteria.
Well I could write a book on this but as a very brief snapshot I think I have a few types. Intelligence-wise I prefer a girl to be either mundane in the brain and not argue with me or contradict me or on the other hand be as clever as me and genuinely have something to contribute. I’ve met few girls in my life who fit into the last category and unfortunately most girls who should be in the former category are ruined by Western social conditioning and fall into the unstated middle category: women who are not as clever as me yet think their opinions are as worthwhile, or probably more worthwhile.
Good signs on a profile are:
- Lack of left-wing political views
- Non-patronising attitude
- Not being proud of how ditsy and annoying they are
- No clues they expect to be treated special because they are female (i.e. they are more equal than men)
- Not insane
- Not neurotic
- Able to articulate in some way what they want
The HB Eight one is a classic. This girl really is quite demure and doesn’t have a lot to say about herself. Good. We’ll get on well and probably be delighted with each other. She will scamper round on her tiny clogged feet, cook me special meals and dream of me when I’m not there. I will pick her up and carry her, fractionate her on an emotional rollercoaster, send her into sexual apoplexy and fight off sabre-tooth tigers to keep her safe.
Notice my last bullet point. This is important. Girls who ramble crap and are unable to articulate what they want are probably very open to be gamed. HOWEVER, you have to get them in real life to do this. With online dating I believe these girls will be so incompetent and flaking that it would be almost impossible to get them out for a real world meet.
On the physical side I have many types. I was in the pub with DrunkenBaker the other day drooling over a tiny Chinese girl talking to a middle aged arab guy. DrunkenBaker asked me what I liked and I said: tiny hands, tiny feet, tiny little legs and arms, smooth skin like porcelain, black hair and big, black eyes. DrunkenBaker thought for a second then searched for a while on his iPhone. “I’ve found your ideal woman” he said. It was Hamble from Playschool:
Online dating: first impressions
I’ve been “doing” online dating for about six weeks now and feel like I’m ready to make a few initial conclusions. In general I’d say my expectations were pretty low to start with but to my amazement I’ve still managed to be disappointed with the experience. I know some guys seems to have success with it; not me so far. And this starts me off nicely with:
Online dating is game
My initial view was that online dating was somehow easy and that should I not be any good at ‘real’ game then I could always just drop back into online dating and get myself fixed up without too much fuss. Wrong. Online dating is just as hard as bargame or daygame. Fair enough, it’s easier to send a message than walk up to someone in a bar but it’s just a whole different set of problems. I was naïve to think that online game was easy and wouldn’t take much effort. Online game is a distinct subset of game and I think that to get results from it you will need to treat it as such and go through a learning process of many months.
Inefficient
I originally thought that seeing as so many people were doing online dating it would be quite easy to set up dates. Wrong. It takes time and effort and every date you get is a result of countless messages sent and hours spent online. BuzzLightyear told me that from about 200 messages on PoF he got about 8 replies[ED: correction, it’s actually 8 day 2’s.]. I’m using a more upmarket, pay site, and I thought it would be lots better; after all, people have paid to join so they must be more serious. When I was using this site last November in Newcastle I had about 14 women message me in the space of 4 weeks and that was with an embarrsingly Beta profile. It seems that in London it’s a different story. I’m beginning to think my success in Newcastle may have been because in the macho hard-drinking Geordie culture I may have been the only male signed up to the site. In London I get the feeling the site has a lot more men on it. And we all know what happens to a woman’s value when there’s an over abundance of men..
I’ve not carried out empirical double-blind studies here; I don’t have multiple profiles and accounts set up (that will come later). My baseline has been that I’ve had tried two reasonable profiles with reasonable sets of pictures. I’ve been taking a look at some of the mens profiles and generally they are very poor. All I can say is mine is better than average. My pictures are ok and a reasonable representation of me. No big turn offs (me in Lycra, me standing next to a big car, etc).
I’ve sent plenty of messages and my results are something like this.
Reply rate for unsolicited messages: 1/10 max.
Reply rate where I message a girl who has checked my profile: approx 1/5
Now I thought online dating would be the easy option. Not true. If I think of a good day of daygame then in less than two hours you can talk to at least a dozen girls that you know for sure you’re attracted to, you can get a pretty good idea if they’re attracted to you and if you know your stuff then in a dozen approaches you should be getting a couple of numbers and a couple of instant dates. To my surprise I discover that daygame is hands down more efficient than online dating. This is inspiring to me. From a couple of hours wandering round London I can chat to a dozen or so pretty women, catch them off their guard and maybe get a phone number or two and possibly even have a coffee with one. This beats sitting at home sending messages to less hot women who generally don’t reply.
In terms of quality I’d say the quality of woman you can get out on a date from online dating is extremely poor. There ARE super-hot women on the sites, but you can bet they get at least ten messages a day from other guys, and sit sifting through profiles deciding who to humour. Generally I found that most women who viewed my profile were:
- Old. A good 50% were a 35 or older.
- Not hot. Probably a 4 or a 5 out of 10 on the looks department.
- Probably fat. A lot of women don’t put body shots on their pictures
After number closing the odd 7 and 8 from daygame then you can see why I’m less than enthused.
I’ve been doing online dating for six weeks and I’d have to say I don’t spend a vast amount of time doing it as I find it increasingly tedious. I’ve had two day 2’s with not particularly attractive women, I have two more lined up and I’ve had two flake on me.
Saps your frame
Not only does daygame generate dates with attractive women at a far higher rate than online dating, but online dating actually gradually saps the confidence rather than builds it, which daygame does. The problem with online dating is far too much of the power is in the hands of the female. What do women do with power? What would a toddler do with a revolver? Nobody’s going to be happy at the outcome I’ll tell you that.
After you have spent hours trawling through the “catalogue”, reading the same banal profiles written by the same generic women over and over again, and you’ve spent further hours crafting excellent, careful messages only to get one reply back out of at least a dozen you send, and this is only for a girl that you don’t really a hundred percent fancy that much, then you think…. “this sucks ass”.
Online dating is playing the game on womens terms. Daygame is playing the game on your terms. That’s why it works and it builds you up.
Why does online dating favour women so much? Because they don’t send a fraction of the messages men do and there are an awful lot less of them than men with full paid up memberships. The end result is that men, as they actually want to try and get somewhere with it, end up sending all the messages and doing all the chasing.
Why do women not send many messages? This is because 90% of women on these sites are like this:
- They are conditioned to regard temselves as something to be chased and wooed.
- They are not sure what they really want so just browse profiles endlessly looking for reasons to reject men.
- They live in a state of permanent confusion and uncertainty.
- They’re tight and whilst they’d happily give a heroin addict a fiver on the tube they can’t bring themselves to part with sixty quid for three months membership. They therefore make the “free” profile to “see what messages they get”, telling themselves they’ll sign up if a really great guy messages them. A woman pay sixty quid to reply to a message? If George Clooney himself message them they still wouldn’t do it.
Saps faith in womanhood
I’d say that for most of my Game journey so far I’ve learned a lot more about women and begun to hate them an awful lot less. I’ve stopped getting annoyed because women are not something I foolishly expected them to be and just accepted them for what they are. Women’s brains are different. They’re fickle. They flake. They are generally pretty retarded. Their brains are full of shit. I know this and I’m okay with this. After all, I want a feminine, sensual, caring woman in my life. Remember: we are the oak, they are the squirrel.
The problem with online dating is it puts the power with the women and the whole thing ends up being fiddly, false and full of time-wasting. Like anything women end up controlling. It’s tedious and it’s frustrating. Why are there thousands of single women over 30? Because their heads are filled with garbage and they waste time, don’t know what they want and think no man is good enough for them. So what happens online? Thousands of single women over 30, endlessly browsing, thinking no man is good enough for them. Sheesh.. they should pass a law where any woman unmarried by 35 has a mandatory hysterectomy. That’d sort things out.
Look, if you study game and self development a bit you come to realise that yes, women are different, but hopefully you accept this and stop resenting them for it. The problem is that if you become involved in a process where you are at the mercy of this ‘difference’ (i.e. stupidity) regularly, e.g. having a woman boss, doing online dating, etc then you will start to resent women for their failings. You might think chimps are okay (they’re not by the way) but I guarantee if they are put in charge of the zoo, not the zookeepers, then everyone will be miserable and covered in shit. Don’t spend your time in that zoo. You won’t like chimps.
*************************
I don’t regret doing it and it’s been an interesting little experiment. It’s one I’m going to continue and try and find my feet a bit more with.
[Edited]
Brilliant article here recommended by Tim discussing the pay-dating site scam.
Dater baiter
Seriously. This all begins a while back when Jimmy Jambone at RSG mails me and asks if he can use my “real” profile on his online dating account. Just to remind you it goes like this:
******************************************
The Reality
Me
- Thirty five but younger at heart than you.
- A bit fat but in a 1950′s bodybuilder style. Big. Strong. Can kill Betas.
- Scary clever.
- Twisted, sick fuck.
- Low expectations of this process. Goal is to cruelly use the dating site to get lots of day2 practice in and obtain a ‘girlfriend’ who is in fact a dependable source of regular sex. This will alter my phermones and body language, get the sex monkey off my back and really help my game and my main goal of getting a really hot or many really hot youngish women with fabulous bodies to fuck me as much as possible and put to rest the demons of a lifetime of failure with women.
- As fit as humanely possible. Body more important than face by far. Fat is only ok if you have great D cup tits, at least. Small tits only acceptable with a good arse. I don’t actually expect you to be that fit. I’m realistic. You may have been fit earlier when you were 20 but now you may be 35 and losing it. Nevertheless as long as I am able to obtain some sexual gratification from you I will consider you. I, too, am 35 but I am a man so I do not go off the boil like you do.
- Intelligence not important. I’ll fuck you if you’re an idiot if you’re fun to be with.
- You shouldn’t have an unreal sense of your own self value. This means if your looks are a 6, as are mine, then your actual value will be half of mine because I am fucking clever and brilliant and you are likely to be quite pedestrian. In this circumstance you will be attractive to me by creating polarity and this is done by being girly and feminine, not by arguing with me.
- You should also not have really low self esteem and be whiney, insecure or neurotic. Even if you’re actually hot I probably won’t be able to stomach being with you long enough even to finger-fuck you.
- Girls aged 30 or over who still get pissed, miss dates, get hungover, flake, have made-up women jobs, I will regard you as nothing but sport.
- Any profiles with women taking delight in their “idiosyncracies” will not be considered. “My friends say I’m moody!”. Fuck no. “I’m demanding and intelligent”. Fuck no. These cretins actually write this shit.
Her
For a minute I think Jimmy is off his tits on mushrooms, but no, he’s serious. After asking him about it it transpires than Jambone likes to put up non-conformist profiles on dating sites and uses it to practice his frame control. Basically he messages twenty or so women and tries to get them to hate him. He then sticks to two rules:
- Every response is an IOI
- Try and build attraction but without compromising your frame
******************************************
This is mindblowing. Here I am toying with the idea of possibly using online dating, mulling over my wee profile and I find out some guy is merely using online dating for sport. Furthermore, someone is so into Game that their hobby is Frame Control. I have to sit down and digest all of this slowly. Jimmy sends me a sample dialogue and the profile of the girl.
[Full Disclosure here: Jimmy talks about this dialogue on his own blog here]
Profile:
[Quite an unpleasant little profile. It’s taken all of two minutes to write. The first sentence says ‘this is beneath me’. The second paragraph is ‘I’m super clever and gorgeous’. The third paragraph is ‘I don’t have time to meet anyone because I’m so high-value’. Can you just imagine a man writing a profile like this?]
Dialogue:
| Original Message YOU sent on 8/31/2010 8:03:18 AMI read your profile and it made me dislike you. You’re probably OK in real life but it’s not doing you any favours. And if I think that, a lot of other men may as well. And it may be the ones you want. I don’t mean to offend, just |
[Oh my god. Are you allowed to say things like this to girls?]
bahahahahha
You’re a ****ing riot. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed your self-entitled representation of the kind of man I might go for. Be assured, you
aren’t.
If you disliked me so much why send me a message?
At your age, you should be actively pursuing the girls you DO like.
peace
[I am the selector. I have always been able to pick men. Slight dig on the age as well.]
| Original Message YOU sent on 8/31/2010 8:39:36 AM I was browsing, saw you, read your profile and just thought it was a shame, that’s all. You ruined a nice smile.Successful guys have choice and pretty faces are common. Your profile might not be enough and I am sure there is more to you. |
[And so he begins to flip the script. Notice he’s not being out and out vile. Apart from being outrageous he’s being polite. Bear in mind this high-value pain in the arse must get dozens of messages a day from men flattering her about her looks, explaining why they are compatiable or bragging about their achievements (think RJ’s ‘begging’, ‘bullshitting’, ‘bragging’) and here’s a guy who is saying ‘looks aren’t everything’. Of course, he’s outrageously bluffing with no cards. Will she bite?]
My profile is not me.
I am more than enough.
Thank you for enforcing a stereotype that I have been trying to
fight with everything I’ve done in life.
Please never write back.
[Result! She bites. So if you’ve been fighting the sterotype your whole life, you hypocritical cunt, then why did you write that awful profile saying your looks were enough? Let’s continue. Remember… every message is an IOI. Hang on! What’s that noise. I hear a throbbing, clunking, grinding noise. Ah ha! It’s the Jimmy Jambone DHV machine warming up.]
| Original Message YOU sent on 9/1/2010 8:02:54 AMAll I am trying to do is help you out. There is no other motive. I am not interested in dating you based on your profile (and now on your resulting reactions). You put yourself below all the women I usually date who are always beautiful AND funny, warm and talented. And yet I am a tall, bi lingual guy and I even own a shaggy dog. Your anger at me and rationale for not liking me are based purely If you don’t want to continue this discussion all you have to do |
[Nice. Nice work. He disqualifies himself at the start then violently axe-kicks her head in with DHV. Notice he reframes it here so that she’s a naïve child. You can bet this girl’s dad talked to her like this. Is he interested in her? No. JJ isn’t doing this to get a date, and it shows, which makes it all the more likely to succeed.]
I am simply continuing this discussion because I’m intrigued and
because the social experiment we’re conducting is unique. Never
again will I have a guy tell me I “lost” him after reading a few
of the sentences I wrote on a silly website.
I’m glad you have a million houses. Go you!
I have my own reasons for writing what I did and for acting the
way I do. You know nothing about my life.
I am young and I am beautiful and I am incredibly talented. I’ve
finished my undergrad at an ivy league school already and was
given a scholarship to come here for a pre grad course. In the
meantime I have been working for a consulting firm in Toronto for
the past year and the work I do gives R&D firms enough money to
promote entrepreneurial growth in my own country. My mother lost
her job to outsourcing so I actively work to strengthen the
business infrastructure at home. You have no right to talk to me
the way you do. I’m also not attracted to you.
I’ve been hurt, I have hurt and I want to have fun now.
I suggest you do the same
[And she replies again. And yet still mentions her beauty, then disqualifies it with the description of her intellectual acheivements. I laughed out loud when I read “I’m also not attracted to you”.]
[Exquisite, Jambone, just exquisite. You can bet your life all this girl’s Higher-Beta square-chinned investment banker boyfriends have never talked to her this way before.] ugh. what’s your shaggy dog’s name? |
|
|
|
[She’s interested]
| Original Message YOU sent on 9/1/2010 9:22:19 AMPlato. My dad was not only the greatest single influence on my life, he was also a philosophy lecturer. We were talking about philosophy while I was still reading the Beano (British weekly comic book).I am at heart my father’s son. Somewhere inside me, and not so deeply, there is a sandal wearing, bearded bespectacled teacher. My last girlfriend. Now she was gorgeous. If you saw a photo of So when guys like me see a profile saying ‘I am beautiful and I swear if your profile was a little more like what you just sent But it’s your life. Just tell me to go **** myself. |
[This is brilliant. Each time I read this I want JJ to date my sister. This is genius. Very carefully written. I’m sure JJ did not just trot this off. Notice what’s going on here. The mention of his father interfused with the mention of Plato, and unashamed admiration for him, the hint that possibly he has passed away which creates Pathos, the vulnerability game about almost being a “sandal wearing, bearded bespectacled teacher” which fractionates beautifully to the next paragraph where he basically just boasts about his ex-girlfriend’s attractiveness. We then get an explanation of why looks are not enough, again, and a final paragraph which again is brilliant: explaining to her like she’s a little girl that if she just opened up more then maybe, just maybe he’d have loved it. Then drops in the reference to sex then immediately switches to the warm, fuzzy picture of him protecting her. Her juices and her tiny brain must be all over the place by now.]
Plato is the philosopher I focused on for my ancient philosophy
minor. I have a specialist degree in Literary criticism: french,
russian, british. I’ve been a student of Plato’s since I was 13.
I began the Republic then and finished it in my second year of
uni. He’s a monument and a giant. I don’t suspect I’ll ever
finish understanding his work.
Funny you should say that; my dad was my main influence as well
as I’m also very much a daddy’s girl. I knew of Plato’s Symposium
since I was 7 having had my dad tell me about these ancient human
creatures who were welded together and then separated by the
furious gods and cut up into the individual, lonely pieces that
comprise our bodies today. He would tell me that love comes into
being from loss, not from gain. Our love making is this temporary
reminder of how we used to live. Yes, it’s all very romantic and
to a 7 year old little girl on a grimy eastern european street
car (I was born and bred in Romania) my father became Homer and I
became….enchanted with philosophy and literature. Those were
the only times I saw my dad; my parents were divorced so these
bits of story telling were all I would get for weeks.
I love dogs. I can’t walk past a stray or even an owned dog
without wanting to make it my own. I have gone so far today
actually as to buy a homeless man’s stray some food. I have a
bleeding heart and I hate myself for it. I’m quirky and silly and
childish and I’m sorry I said mean things to you. It’s so unlike
me. This site is unlike me. You are rather cute.
Be well,
<name>
[Admittedly unreal luck here with the Plato reference, but it’s knocked this girl for six. Just look at the turnaround here from the first few messages. Brilliant. This girl is attracted now and she admits it. Game set and match Jambone, with zero collapse of frame or supplication.]
******************************************************
Print this off. Read it a few times. Cogitate. I did. This single exchange altered my perspectives on two things:
- What’s possible with Game
- Social conditioning
The second is the most important. What this exchange really did for me is make me focus on why I felt so uncomfortable reading the dialogue to start with. Tell me, how did you feel when you read it? Personally I felt uneasy. I got a strange physiological reaction in the stomach. It just felt “wrong” and I realised this was years of social conditioning having its effect on me. This was the way I’d been raised with the double standard of “be nice to girls”. I firmly believe that as males in this country we are raised with a good, strong hypocritical double standard and this has a great effect on us, and a lot of men are unaware of it.
Women are equal but don’t be mean to them.
(In other words they’re equal when they want to be but you should still treat them special)
Ridiculous. Where this comes from is from an age, not too long ago, when we didn’t have this fake equality, when women were actually different. Where they didn’t work and compete with men. Where they respected men for what they built and achieved and didn’t try and belittle them. Chivalry made more sense then. What women have done is demand equality but, like the manipulative weasels they are, demanded special treatment.
I suggest you think long and hard about this. You need to free yourself from this social conditioning. Women aren’t special. Don’t respect a woman because she’s a woman, respect a good woman because she’s a good woman just like you’d respect a good man. This social conditioning is dangerous to you because this double standard is often at the root of men who put women on a pedestal and objectify them. If you can treat women totally normally and not be intimidated or affected by that massive, high pile of value they’re sitting on (which is hard, as nature designed that to be enough value for men to fight tigers to win) then you might get somewhere.
I decide to start my training and trawl my online dating site for a girl who annoys me. I find a nice looking girl, probably Argentinian, with a lazy, lazy profile and a few pictures of herself looking pretty. Unfortunately due to my attentions she’s now locked her pictures so I can’t put them here but let’s say she looks a bit like Venezuelan but one or two points out of ten hotter.
This is her profile:
Her:
I ve lived in many places by now, and I ve moved to London recently. I enjoy spending time with my friends, going to art shows, exhibitions, concerts, and I love music- I also work a lot, which gives me little time to rest!
Him:
I do not think there is something like an ideal match- I believe in chemistry. In any case, this is not a formula. I dont think those exist…
[Translation: I’m high value because I am. Men have always given me attention. I’ve never had to try. Now I’m in new city I find myself lacking my validating social circle. Mmm I’ve heard a bit about online dating. Ok ok finally I pay the money and sign up. I upload some pictures, oooh I’m pretty, and one picture shows me in a museum, which I went to once one day a few months ago, so that shows I’m deep. Write a profile, that’s three minutes that’ll be enough. Now I sit back and simply sift through the dozens of messages all the Betas and Higher-Betas send me, pick the richest man with the squarest jaw that looks most like my father or ex boyfriend and we’re done]
On 2010-10-15 at 22:28:18, Bhodisatta wrote:
LazyArgie,
I read your profile and it made me think ‘what a waste of a lovely smile’. Is that really all you have to say about yourself? Two sentences? It’s lazy.
Do you want someone to pick you just for the way you look? I know there’s more to you; the reason I contacted you is because on your last picture you’re in The British Museum, which I love, standing next to a poster for the Rude Britannia exhibition, which I also loved and something just clicked. Plus… you look like a genuinely happy person.
Don’t mean to offent, just thought I’d let you know.
Bhodisatta
[Nice opening salvo Bhodisatta. I also cunningly notice the exhbition in the picture and comment on it which is probably more than most of the pandering messages she gets do.]
On 2010-10-15 at 22:39:59, LazyArgie wrote:
Bhodisatta, rather than lazy, I am reluctant to define myself in a few sentences. I d rather have you figure that out, for instance, from inspecting the pic at the tate britain (not british museum) carefully.
I dont want somone to pick me just the way I look- but we are a good mix of body and soul in the end. I wonder if you would have ever written this message if I had a missing tooth!
Anyway, you did not offend! Maybe now you get to see that the same painting may have different meanings..
Cheers
[This stupid bitch actually thinks that having one picture where she’s in a Museum is enough to show her character. Then with the missing tooth comment she is basically referring back to her looks saying ‘I am pretty, how dare you not value that’]
On 2010-10-18 at 21:43:01, Bhodisatta wrote:
Hello LazyArgie.
I’m glad you replied: shows you have some oomph. Well… one picture of you standing in the Tate Britain: hardly tells me much does it? So you went to a museum. Wow. With whom? Why? What did it mean to you.
[Well it’s certainly satisfying to read but from a tehnical perspective I have not built enough interest to justify her qualifying herself to me yet. Nice try, though.]
Don’t try and guess what I’d do if you had a broken tooth. That comes across as vain.
[Good. True]
I just thought it was a shame that’s all. I’ve seen a lot of lovely south american girls and they are sweet, intelligent people yet there’s something about the culture which just makes them sit there waiting for men to come talk to them because they’re pretty.
[Ha. So true. Her brain probably cannot process this as valuing female beauty is so intrinisic to South American culture]
Bhodisatta
[Not enough DHV here. There is still the whiff that I’m actually a cunning Beta trying to turn this around and get her to beg me for a date]
On 2010-10-18 at 21:52:54, LazyArgie wrote:
Bhodisatta, you are so full of cliches. sorry!
[Truth hurts]
it is just that i dont want to share more personal details on the web. if i get to meet someone, then we ll talk. pretty much as it happens in real life, dont you think?- whenever you meet some random person in a pub/bar.
[This is not a bar you dumb bitch]
i ve never thought of doing this online dating stuff until quite recently, and i am reluctant to write about me just like that. anyway, we dont seem to be on the same page! 😛
[She wants to do online dating but feel it is beneath you to write about yourself. I fucking hate her now.]
On 2010-10-20 at 10:43:30, Bhodisatta wrote:
I’d recommend you give up this online dating thing and just go sit in a bar and wait for men to come and talk to you.
[Dead straight]
***********************************
I don’t get any more messages back. I’ve broken Jimmy’s rules but in the end I hated her so much it was more fun sticking a stilleto of truth in her guts than practicing Frame Control but on the good side I find I’ve freed myself of a lot of that terrible Beta desperation I used to have. I actually hate this girl and there’s no way she’s good enough for me.
Verdict: a decent start.
I show this dialogue to DrunkenBaker.
DrunkenBaker: (holding stomach) Ooooh ooh this is weird. Oh I can almost not read it. It makes me feel funny, you talking to her like this.
Me: Keep reading. Do you like her
DrunkenBaker: No… no… you’re right in what you say… but… I dunno… it just feels wrong…
Me: You have been socially conditioned.
The hilarious thing is after a few weeks I check her profile again (to try and get pictures for this post) and notice she’s locked her photos and made an all out effort to add more personality into it:
Why should you get to know LazyArgie?
I ve lived in many places by now, and I ve moved to London recently. I enjoy spending time with my friends, going to art shows, exhibitions, concerts, and I love music- I also work a lot, which gives me little time to rest! I am looking for someone who s willing to enjoy London as much as I do and and spend some time together.
[We now have four sentences; a pathetic DHV, generic crap (which is in itself a DLV), the offensive description of how busy she is (so she’s so high value she probably doesn’t have enough time to meet you) and a final pointless truism sentence. This girl has never had to work for male attention her whole life. She will never get a truly high value male.]
She describes her ideal match thus:
I do not think there is something like an ideal match- I believe in chemistry. However, in my few weeks here I ve realized that online dating can be quite random….so here it goes.
I d say I am looking for an intelligent, generous, light hearted person who is willing to spend time with someone he cares for, but who is also passionate about his work and quite independent (that is pretty much my own description, btw). Plus I love discovering new places but my sense of direction is terrible, so a smart partner in crime with a good sense of direction would help!! 😛 I also find quite sexy a guy that knows how to cook.
In any case, this is not a formula. I dont think those exist…
[She’s exhausting her tiny brain here writing this much. Her hands must ache. Basically I can summarise it like this: she has no idea what she really wants nor what her type is. Like a lot of women she is incapable of even articulating or specifying what she likes in a man. I’d argue this is not so much tragic as an opportunity. If you get to meet a woman like this (which you never will through a site like this) then she will probably be delightfully feminine (if tamed right) and nicely malleable.]
You didn’t think I’d want someone cleverer than me and with a head full of silly ideas now did you?
Tiny piece of Game in coffee shop
I did some Game therefore I can write about it. Just grabbed a coffee at work and had a nice little chat in the cafe. I’ve noticed a gorgeous little brunette works there now. Slim, small, very pale skin, dark, dark eyes and raven black hair. She was there today with her non-HB but very friendly Fillipino workmate.
Me: Hi there. [beaming smile]
Filipino: Hi [smiles. eyes roll up as she tries to remember]… americano, grande right?
Me: [Just look at her, expectantly. Point at her]
Filipino: [giggles… thinks a bit]
Me: Can’t get it?… Ok, it’s decaff.
[both laugh]
Me: You’ll learn it soon
[I’ve been ignoring the HB up till now and she can’t stand not being included and sidles in]
HB: [to Filipino] they all expect us to remember their drinks! [steals side-glances at me]
Me: [to Filipino] I’ll tell you what, each time you get it wrong I’ll slap you. Will that help?
[calibration is off here but it still goes ok and she laughs]
Filipino: Yes, that’d help.
Me:[to them both] the other girl, the tall Polish girl with blonde hair, she always remembered my drink
[get women talking about other women, even better their colleagues and their jealousy engines immediately start warming up. also illustrates pre-selection i.e. another girl bothered to remember my order]
Filipino: oh you mean Anna, the supervisor?
Me: No! No! This girl had curly hair, Anna’s hair is like a blonde helmet [do hand gesture]
[they both laugh a lot. I realise here they really like me. I’m kind of mildly eye-fucking the Filipino as well throughout]
Filipino: Oh! you’re so funny… [I’m fascinated to see that as she says this she turns and looks at the HB and kind of nudges to me. She is in effect DHV’ing me to the HB and giving me the selection-OK]
HB: [to Filipino] Where do you think he’s from?
[Filipino tries to guess]
HB: no… Newcastle!
Me: [point at HB. pointing is nicely demeaning. then talk to Filipino] I thought she was Eastern European [a neg? a compliment (they are fitter)? neither: it’s ambiguity. scatters her brain nicely to let me walk on in)
Filipino: I think she looks kind of Italian
[Me. Make dismissive rasping noise with lips and flick hand to indicate I do not wish to discuss HB]
Filipino: you don’t care?
Me: [just flick head a bit, neither a yes nor no] She’s probably a Romanian and is just lying.
[comedic neg. also there is an undertone here of what on earth is a Brit doing working in a coffee bar in London. is she poor? this is too dangerous to go near and possibly a little cruel so I avoid it directly. Also, I am quite OK with dating a nice, feminine girl who works in a coffee shop, in fact it could work really well.]
HB: [to me] where do you think she’s from?…… China!
Me: [laugh at her] Obviously not. It’s the Phillipines.
[they are both impressed]
Filipino: wow!
Me: Manilla I believe
Filipino: WOW!! [just guessed. always guess the capital city]
[I’m ignoring HB again by now]
Filipino: how did you know?
Me: Oh… I’ve been there
[wait. no boasting]
Filipino: holiday? or business?
Me: a bit of both. the company I used to work for had offices in China and the Phillipines. I was working in China so I took the chance to visit the Phillipines.
[unleash the guns of DHV]
Filipino: wow. what did you think?
Me: different… a little dangerous
Filipino: maybe…
Me: well if you’re a six foot white guy wandering round looking for Starbucks it is
[drop in the fact I’m nicely tall and tower over these tiny females]
[by now they are both kind of glowing and their energy is ‘pinging’ off each other. I realise that what i am seeing here is the “females in presence of Alpha male” response]
[Another customer turns up. They ignore him and are staring at me]
[Pick up my coffee, give a deep, quick look at HB and she gives me a gorgeous, sexual smile. I look at Filipino, beaming smile then..]
Me: I’m off now. See you guys later.
[As I leave they are both still staring at each other with a strange look and weird, scatty body language]
Let me extrapolate a few conclusions.
- Game is best when it’s not game, when it’s just identity and being social combined with a basic knowledge of how to not fuck up.
- Game is fun
- If there’s an HB with a totally out of the question friend or colleague: like here where the 18 year old HB with the 35 year old short, plump, Fillipino mother was, then it’s good fun to eye-fuck and heat up the ‘obstacle’ and ignore the target. They sense the energy and it warms them up by proxy, too.
- Get a woman talking about other women. It kicks in their jealousy circuits. I’ve only just realised this.
- Use ambiguity. I’ve never done this before and always taken a nerd’s delight in being black or white. I don’t know why I started doing it but it’s good stuff. It just kind of scatters a woman. You give an ambiguous answer and their brain fuzzes. Their forebrain is trying to deconstruct it while the hindbrain gets aroused at a man demonstrating emotional control.
- There’s an art to gaming a group and working them off each other.
- Women go WEIRD when their hindbrains realize there is An Alpha Present. They fiddle, shuffle, get a weird vibe off each other, will look at each other and get really excited.
I’ll probably Game the HB a bit more then try a number-close.
Go get a coffee.
Blog disgust. Me.
DrunkenBaker was ripping it out of me a few weeks ago saying that I was the ultimate bedroom-PUA and was more interested in writing about Game than doing it. We both realised how utterly apt my monker ‘Bhodisatta’ is as I truly do remain pure to help others (mainly that little shit DrunkenBaker) gain enlightenment. I was pompously lecturing him on the power of Future-Projection and he said “what’s that?”. Next thing I know he’s reporting it’s awesome power from a date he used it on. Later on he’s telling me of his plan to reveal his secret love for his long term Oneitis and I laugh at his “frankly amateurish” plans; launching into a twenty-five minute long lecture about reinvention, emotional relevance, emotional control, Alpha-frames and Fractionation as he stared at me open-mouthed.
What has happened to me? My ratio of knowledge to application is probably 5:1. His is probably 1:1. Every single thing he knows he can apply; with results. He is fucking two women with a third being cleaned and dressed for the oven as we speak. I am fucking none.
I do not want this to become the sad man’s blog. This is not intended to be the place guys come to to read nerdy articles and avoid actually doing Game. I don’t want to be that guy who knows everything about Game and gets no success. I don’t want my blog comments to be from similar middle-aged pua-nerds discussing theory.
My inital decision was to kill this blog and actually post nothing until I actually closed a girl in some form or other. I’ve actually ignored my blog for a couple of weeks out of self-disgust. However I’ve had a think and a pense and backed off a little from this. Yes, in a way it’s a sad blog but I do enjoy writing and want to develop this skill and this blog is a great way to do it. So the compromise is to post less. Expect less posts! I’ll put a few up when and only when I feel like it.
I’ve recently had to make a firm decision about my accommodation, job and finances and have decided to commit 100% to my Game Sabbatical. This is a minimum of December and January in London (should I actually succeed in finding somewhere to live!) doing Game pretty much full time. I WILL pick up my blog properly during this period and probably be posting a lot.
Why am I taking a Game Sabbatical?
Game is hard. Well coming from a position of having comprehensively fucked Inner Game it is. Super-hard. Harder than pickled marble.
Time is short. I’m weak. I get tired a lot. I need eight hours sleep a night. After a day’s work I feel monged and my soul is squashed and want to just go home and vegetate. My job itself kills the state I need to do Game. All my joie de vive, the tiny crumb-sized amount I have, is eradicated. I don’t even want to speak to people. I’ve got no buzz. I actually look foward to going to bed. Draw the curtains. Get a nice M&S mini-salad on the go, stick some ‘Big Bang Theory’ on the laptop, mong-out.
Learning to Game by doing it once a week on weekends is like trying to learn to play the guitar or to box by doing it once a week on weekends. No, even better, it’s like trying to learn to act by doing it once a week. Crap. Ineffective. A chore. London is full of guys doing dribs and drabs of Game and failing to make real progress. It ends up not being fun, and if you’re tired from a week of work then you don’t want to spend a day of your precious weekend doing Game.
This is why I’m taking time off. I’m doing Game every day. I’m going total immersion. Each day will build on the previous one; I’ll be doing sessions of Game with a successiveness close enough to build on the latent state and skill gained from the previous session. It’s like a ladder; you do a Game session once and you climb three steps. You wait a week and you’ve come down two steps already.
The trick is to gorge on it and build on it. Get yourself to Pimp level, internalize the change, seal it in, brand it into your brain, repeat, repeat, repeat, retrain that elephant. Then you can go back to the day job and do it once or twice a week and all the suffering is done; you’re at a level where it’s fun and you look forward to it and it isn’t a chore.
Establishing a harem is something you can also do on a sabbatical. Getting a harem, or at least a couple of girlfriends on the go takes time and effort. I’ve been doing some online dating recently and part of the problem is people just don’t have time to even date! Work, commute, sleep. Work, commute, sleep.
I don’t know if two or three months will be long enough, it probably won’t, but it’s a start. Jump myself up a level, get a couple of hos on the go, even just one, then go back to the boring day job (hopefully one which damages my soul less) knowing I have female company ‘sorted’ and enough skills to Game on impulse whenever I feel like it.
Bhodisatta's Blog. 
